Suburban soccer snob

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I’ve been working ballgames at South Stadium on Milwaukee’s near south side since 1965. That’s when as a kid I helped my father take and count tickets at football games. Now I’m a PA announcer for football and I time soccer.

Thursday night I was assigned to time the WIAA playoff game at South Stadium between Milwaukee Carmen and Heritage Christian (located in New Berlin). Remember it had rained most of the day.

As I was about to make my way up to the press box a woman who was a Heritage Christian fan, I’d say in her late 30’s to early 40’s approached me rather than the clearly marked Event Staff personnel. She was calm, pleasant, soft-spoken. Let me paraphrase our conversation.

WOMAN:  All the (metal stadium) seats are wet.


WOMAN: Are we expected to sit on wet seats?

ME: We have no control over the weather.

WOMAN: Don’t you have any paper towels?

ME: You have to remember. This is an MPS facility, a nice facility. But we don’t have any paper towels.

WOMAN: Would there be any in the women’s room?

ME:  I’m not privy to what’s inside the women’s room.

WOMAN: I wonder if I checked…can I go there and check?

ME: Of course you can but I think you’d be out of luck. There are towel dispensers attached to the wall in the men’s room, but no paper towels.

WOMAN: Oh, and $6 to attend a soccer game??? (Fans usually get in free during the regular season).

ME: That’s right. This is a WIAA tournament so the WIAA is in charge and they require $6 admission. That’s statewide. Every playoff game in Wisconsin charges admission.

She shrugged her shoulders and walked away. No ‘thank you’ or ‘have a good night.’

When I got to the press box I relayed my story to my colleagues and said the woman basically indicted an entire suburb. Suburbia in general.

I thought I had seen or heard everything at the ballpark all these years. I was wrong.

One thought on “Suburban soccer snob

  1. I believe we have become a society that expects others to take care of us. From the government down to the service industry. Why didn’t it occur to her to run to the store for paper towels herself? Don’t tell me she can’t afford it over the 6 dollars for the game.
    People aren’t used to being problem solvers anymore. They don’t find solutions. She wanted you to fix it, and complain about it.


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