Culinary no-no began on Father’s Day 2007, a beautiful summer day, when I wrote about grilling brats. And eating brats. And topping those brats. I was inspired by my wife, Jennifer who, in my admittedly unscientific opinion, ruins brats by squirting ketchup on them. Other dining taboos quickly came to mind. The original idea was to take this concept only a few months, till the end of summer and then pull the plug. Then the unexpected happened. People started reading Culinary no-no. Lots of folks. So we keep doing the no-no.
I never know when I might be inspired by a potential Culinary no-no topic.
This week’s came just yesterday (Saturday) in the Franklin Sendik’s when I saw…
No, no, no.
Oh, I saw a blonde, alright. Just not that blonde.
Sendik’s had a large display appropriately in advance of St. Patrick’s Day that included…
That’s in stark contrast to the original traditional Guinness…
Guinness Blonde is not new. The lager has been on the market for several years. The brewer describes Blonde this way:
Irish tradition meets American spirit in Guinness Blonde American lager. Complex and flavorful. Light, floral and alive with citrus. This beer is perfectly balanced with a lingering malt and biscuity finish. It’s the coming together of vibrant flavors, of character drawn from both sides of the pond. And it’s come a long way to get here.
Ireland and America go way back. Ours are histories that have crossed paths countless times. Our cultures may be totally different but we’ve still got a lot in common. One thing we can definitely agree upon is what makes a good beer. Whether it’s stout or lager, we demand the same things: quality, distinctiveness, character. Guinness Blonde combines the best European brewing techniques – as well as our famous strain of Guinness yeast – with the finest American hops and malts. A collaboration between the Guinness brewers in Dublin and their counterparts at the Latrobe Brewery in Pennsylvania, the result is an American pale lager akin to that of the 1930s: a crisp, light beer that’s big on flavor.
Guinness dates back to the mid-1700’s. That Guinness never looked like Guinness Blonde.
This might be, in the more than 500 Culinary no-no installments, the earliest I’ve unveiled the actual no-no to readers.
When I saw the Sendik’s display, even though I’ve been aware of Guinness Blonde for years, I immediately turned to my wife, Jennifer and said, “That’s just not right.”
I may have also used the word “sacrilegious.”
Jennifer quickly replied that, and it makes total sense, that Guinness Blonde is for consumers like her. She doesn’t like Guinness. My wife is Polish. And she’s blonde, too. A lighter Guinness is more palatable as far as she’s concerned. So, yes, in 2018, that’s good business.
But Guinness Blonde is not Guinness. OK, it’s Guinness. But it’s re-packaged, re-branded, re-marketed Guinness.
If I want a lager I’ll buy a Miller, a Pabst, a Budweiser.
But at St. Patrick’s Day time, I want a Guinness. Dark. A stout.
Guinness Blonde is light, wimpy Guinness.
It’s an Irish rugby player hiding under his mattress.
It’s John Wayne refusing to fight in “The Quiet Man.”
It’s an Irish wolfhound running away from a chihuahua.
Buy Guinness Blonde and drink it this week or on March 17 and you have NOT officially celebrated St. Patrick’s Day.
Oh, and one more no-no about Guinness.
It’ll bloat you. Too fattening.
From the UK’s popular broadband provider, https://home.bt.com:
The company was told to stop using one of its old advertising slogans- ‘Guinness is good for you’ – years ago. But one study suggested drinking Guinness could actually help prevent heart clots, the benefits of which could not be said for lager.
Some people even reckon it’s good for washing your hair in… but we’ll leave you to check that one out for yourselves.
A common misconception of the drink is that it’s ‘heavy’ and so full of calories. In fact, a pint contains around 200 calories – which is actually less than other lagers, and even less than a pint of orange juice (220 cal)!
Be Irish on St. Patrick’s Day. Drink Guinness Stout.
CULINARY NO-NON BONUSES